I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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