dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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