but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We don't watch enough power rangers
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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