it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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