sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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