If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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