my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
