somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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