i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
The Olympian is in my bed
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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