He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
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I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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