yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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