i permit you to call me
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
