He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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