dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize