Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize