maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize