Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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