Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money

(813): View more from Florida

sounds like you understand them just fine

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(310): View more from California

Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.

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(214): View more from Texas

Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"

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(815): View more from Illinois

If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.

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(517): View more from Michigan

We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.

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(585): View more from New York

I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk

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(740): View more from Ohio

We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?

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