called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
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