woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize