She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize