He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
