i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize