we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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