He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
