I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize