I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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