nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
