i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
