you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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