dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
