They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
