I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
