I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
