Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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