yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
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i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
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