i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Who died my cat blue again?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
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