can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
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