This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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