Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
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