I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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