If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
