im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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