so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
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