did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
