scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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