Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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