my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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