i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
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