I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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